Surprise Hammers In The Cold At Skegness

I realise that this trip happened nearly a month ago, but I've had a lot to do (Shipman can attest to that,  Jekyll and Hyde now officially a time stealer). Because this trip was so long ago, you will probably be looking at half of these photos thinking "when was that?", and the other half thinking "I remember that!" with amazement that you actually can remember it...

Let's kick it off with some technological ineptness from Tom Winter!

Ahhhhhhh...

Dom on the phone to Powley getting BZ's product package deals sorted out

Tom's new phone. It was pretty swish, so as he was a simple fellow from Grantham, he couldn't use it!

Lovely

Megareefa

And it didn't even rain!

Worth reading, the metro

Check the moobs!

We got there, and our faith in WESC was immediately shaken by some mongo mongrels. One of them was actually quite good. Check the terrorist 2nd from the right. "Hey Bam! Bam! Skateboarding is not a crime!" - Brandon

Tom wondering what the point is of throwing a plastic head everywhere

Sam getting his radslash on

Launch it!

It's fun to throw plastic Corpse Bride heads about!

Said corpse bride head. With brain!

Sam showing that chickens do not like helmets!

Better than Martyn Hill? Not really, no!

Cheap version of the illuminations

Tom getting off at the idea of a clogged artery. Notice Dom's porker face getting stuck into his chicken in the background

The results of Sam's game of "Throw the leftover supposedly-chicken shit into the already full bin". Dom and Tom said that eating KFC is living (Dom was serious?!) just before they both proclaimed they had stomach cramps and resorted to bluetoothing each other for the rest of the journey.

Dom's disgusting, stinking train food

Sam's stolen train food

My nice train drink

Sam did...

...and afterwards

Dom Holmes inspects the case and declares, "Elementary my dear Watson, KFC causes downs!"

Quite a few bits of this trip I didn't blog, such as BZ's ripped arse on his trousers, Dom and getting properly angry at me stealing his childhood aka a chicken nugget, for which he was pissy with me for the rest of the trip, insisting that I pay him 20p! Once again, I realise this post is pretty much irrelevant because of the amount of time gone by since it actually happen, but I had a lot to do, and excuses excuses...

Upon return...

It seems my worries about Stoke were completely unfounded, and the one thing I wasn't worried about; that it would be good, did go wrong, and it wasn't good at all! Ah well, doing the blog for it now so you lot can see what went on, although the only person that looks at this is Alex, and he was there, so I suppose that kind of makes my last comment redundant...

Frustration and annoyance

Why have my sought-after Vans disappeared from the internet in my size?

Why do you have to upload and caption pictures on this thing backwards if you want them to appear in the right order?

Why do I bother with such long bloody picture blogs?

Why aren't we allowed out at lunch?

Why do we have so much homework?

Why are people so obsessed with the childish activity of firing little folds of paper from elastic band?!

Answer all of these with a one sentence long answer containing the words "Scottish", "stapler", and "rain", and you will receive nothing at all. Incentive eh?

Yankeedoodle went to Stoke.

And came back annoyed that it hadn't been nearly as good as he thought it would be. Ah well, here's a collection of pictures from a blog addicted human.

Thought I'd kick it off with the lynchpin of the universe; Lukas' dog Deezel!

"Come here you idiot, let me do it. Haha, look at this comment!"

Look at that, a shite camera!

Bloggin' my Blog!

New terrorist group that I'm part of, we're against all Nialls...

EdBed saw himself in my lens and realized his plastic surgery had gone horribly wrong!

"Right, we need to skate down the hill doing tricks like we're on Skate"

Lukas' new myspace default by request. Or just gay bros.

Hey hey we're the monkeys, or something like it.

Me - "Ok, you can get down now"

Eddy - "Right, next time you can stand on a pole for ages for a photo that blurred, my leg is shaking!"

EdBed, the most intelligent of the group, had an idea, and preceded to pass it on to Lukas. Ginge's caption.

Gorm and Headbanger. Head and Gormbanger.

Deaf pirate? Most definately CBBC!

MacDonalds food, good stuff. Bumped into Theo and Tom Cropper as we came in, Tom thought my sleeping bag was a tent?! Alex doesn't much like MacDonalds, especially the one at Melton. Ask him to find out why.

Alex nearly throwing up with laughter after my reaction to Eddy putting a chip with ice cream on it into my mouth, which involved me yelling, spluttering, laughing, choking, and coughing!

Eddy lurking as usual behind an abnormally gay-looking Alex and a normally retarded looking Lukas. "Come in!".

Toy soldiers

Termibrun and Forest Ginge

"Dang Termibrun, I failed Slow Rider on easy!" This is really funny and well made, but Alex hasn't put it up on Youtube for some reason. Shame.

Best desktop I've ever seen, now then Parky!

Parky and... JOHN DOUGLAS RANBY ! (Alex's granddad, if you've got Facebook look him up, he's bare chill!)

Lukas being stoked on a PSP he couldn't work, and my hat which he couldn't work either really. Although the full Topman outfit works well(?)

Harry - "Oi Alex, It's your favourite bit!"

Alex - "No it isn't, this isn't the bit where he bangs her!"

Leonidis, also known as Callum Gould. You'd have to be in top set English to get that one!

Never have I seen wheels being changed drawing so much attention... "Oi boys, he's pointing a camera at us" "No, It's alright, It's for his blog!"

Quik fit'll fix it? Nah, BZ'll Fix it!

"Oh God, we're going to get bummed by a bunch of goths!" To explain that quote, we were on our way back from the park and I decided to see what this photo would look like, and just as Alex was taking it, a bunch of goths turned up, and sat down on a bench about 6 foot from us. It wasn't particularly threatening, but there was a fairly large group of them! It must have looked pretty strange to them; Brandon aimlessly wandering about, Alex sat on a board pointing my camera up at me, and me stood in front of a streetlight looking down at him. Oh, and I was wearing Spag's hat backwards, which prompted BZ to ask "Where we going now then Ben?" on the way back from the park.

I don't know what to caption this... I suppose this will do

Alex's computer with the downs

BZ's got the munchies, not to mention the downs!

"Haha, It looks like a plantpot!"

Mmmm, Oasis...

Alex working long into the night trying to rectify the problem of us having Lukas' shirt because of Laura basically telling us to fuck off, and him wanting it back.

The delusional granny with dementia. City of Ember, highly (un)recommended

Yet another Myspace default attempt for Lukas that went wrong

Bz face is screwed up because he had just spent the previous 5 minutes jumping into the advertisements for films. With his head. I did it, and it gave me a headache. And he did it more than me!

This film could possibly have been infinitely better than City of Ember, but we'll never know. EEEE-GORRR!

The boys

Cheers to BZ for the photo and also for acting like a ladder and being extremely interested in a slug that fell off the roof of the cinema. Here is me sat on said roof after watching the worst film ever!

Running back from Lukas' house to Alex's in a race with Ena and BZ. We saw them outside Curries, and they said they had only just got back before our sweaty frames fell through the door!

I ended up losing him just after this, as we ran across the road next to Curries

Me - "Get stuck"

Brandon - "I can't get stuck, if I did that I would be stuck!"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PX6GzNDZtZM

Seans so hot right now

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9PnW9UctFXU

"You people are retarded, fuck you!"

Nerdin' it up

http://www.myspace.com/sk8tr131, read what Lukas has put under the video, and then try it. Impossible!

Me - "Hold still, you're blurring it!"

Alex - "I can't, I'm taking off my jeans, they're stuck, and I look like I'm giving birth!"

"I can't wait to see them FREAKY DEAKYS!"

Ughhh, morning...

Kip it off Bushbaby!

Grin it off!

The last thing we did before we went to sleep was conduct an autopsy on this alien

"Rendering Downs.avi"

Brekkie

The crucial envelope from Document as an invitation for the DIY Big Push... Oh God...

Darth Donny BZ, the new horrific evil in out world, that kills by jubbing...

And so the fellowship set off in search of a misleading place called Stoke, that looked good on footage but was actually really not that good.

On the road yet again

"She keeps staring at me, I think she's pissed off..."

Does what it says on the tin: It dings, it dongs, and it... dynamo smags? No, that's not right...

This photo could be seen in so many ways. Is it an image of Alex only just becoming aware of a giant paedo with a tiny bag name Brandon chasing him? Is it an image of the two of them running from me? Actually, it's just Alex laughing to Brandon about a certain stinker who shall not be named (the Mangina).

Alex - "Look, a marble block"

Me and Brandon - "That's concrete you dickhead"

Alex - "Oh yeah..."

When I took this, I was going to caption it paradise or heaven or something, but now I'm captioning it as this explanation plus a warning never to go there on the weekend. Or ever.

"Stretch it off!"

Let's get the camera out... and film shit all

HAHA!

Retard thought he was almost Rogie. Never did it though, to our disappointment. The slam would have been so funny!

Get on up that wall son. "I'm going to backslash the purple line", BZ doing a wallride, on a digicam with huge shutter delay!

It looked so weird with its huge legs and tiny body, Alex found this spider hilarious!

Grot turned up (Haha, Turdburglers!)

Gun 'em down!

BZ's grip job, encouraging us through the hail of BMXers and lurkers

Ah, Nordberg is it?

Ressurrection of the retarded faces. Poor, poor people.

His life is over

as is Ratface's, aka Dan Leech

Old Gooseface aka Smedstench came to join in the fun

It took many an attempt to capture the shining face of the chocolate man

The high point of the trip, the car journey back...

The blurred text in the middle of the picture (at the start of the paragraph) actually says "Nic "Chode" Powley". Strange.

My hand afterwards. In 2 days it was put through being grazed on Shipman's sofa, supporting a commando roll out of a powerslide gone wrong, getting blood blister-esque things, blisters, and griptape thumb.

To be honest, we had more fun the few hours we spent in Grantham the day before we left. It was packed, there was abusive men from with newcastle accents everywhere, the car journey was far too long, and the boredom was such that Alex would, and was, quite happily doing block tricks and attempts on the blocks at the bottom, whilst I ended up doing frontside wallrides up stairs and no comply tailslide again and again, and BZ just went up the wall, literally. The bowl was wet, and there were plenty of lurkers. Don't go there, I never will again.

Disclaimer: the phrase "chocolate man" was not intended to be racist